It is almost 6 months to the day since we brought my Uncle John home from the nursing home. Caregiving is not what I thought it would be. (yes, yes, yes -- I know -- some of you tried to warn me!) I did not expect the emotional toll to be so high -- pull up to the booth and throw your life and heart and soul and creativity into the basket, please. This is one seriously high-priced highway... If it weren't for TJay and Joe, I'd have cracked up no time. (I've been on the edge a few times, I think) I miss the city and my friends and my freedom. I sat outside chain-smoking this evening and watched the clouds pass in front of the moon and decided that I can't let anymore of myself slip away like those clouds. So I've prepped about 100 little boards with gesso and laid out a palette and oil paints. My goal is to make one small painting each day, until it feels right again.